It's funny how every person is anal in their own quirky way, and yet is convinced of their complete normalcy with respect to others. This, as expected, leads to us being judgemental of others (in various degrees, of course; anybody who tells you they are not judgemental at all is lying through their teeth)- their actions, words, attire, culture, habits and nature- often being ridiculously oblivious to the fact that they are being subjected to the same by the same- or different- people. It's funnier how people with similar cultural backgrounds tend to be more abrasive of each other, especially if they come from different geographical locations, as though they fail to note where their similarity begins and where it ends, thus creating a series of misplaced expectations upon each other that- even in the case of a very minor slip-up- tends to create occasion for undeserved snide remarks and harsh, spiteful scrutiny on the part of the one(s) seemingly wronged towards the other.
In this context, I think of a person who prided herself on her sarcastic (witty in her words) tongue, symptomatic of the disease in the liberal, intellectual climate of a cosmopolitan university where one feels the need to distinguish themselves from others to such an extent that they choose friends from a very narrow social spectrum that they aspire towards, so as to distance themselves from the other kind- the uncool types (rather a large and diverse category in itself for each individual)- that they shudder to identify themselves with. The freedom to choose friends and bond with them strongly in a competitive environment gives rise to insecurities (often very well-camouflaged) that one then tries to mitigate through words- abrasive, cutting, spiteful, damaging and sometimes downright cruel- targetted on those deemed weaker than oneself by one of many standards, hence basing those new bonds on the carcasses of others- the less important ones. The 'wit' I talk about becomes a tool for elimination, sometimes with methods that can be considered brutal and random, so as to project and protect an image of the self that one tries to build, distancing oneself from the one they were born and grew up with, that which connects them closest to their roots. To prop oneself up, one needs to balance oneself on somebody else, possibly crushing them in the process, and some people thrive in using this method repeatedly to build their lives, irrespective of how competitive the atmosphere gets; sometimes it is just a habit one enjoys too much to get rid of it.
The idea behind this piece was not to judge this breed, of whom I am undoubtedly a part too, at some level (though, as we both agree, that purpose did not quite get served in this piece). The point is to suggest that "what goes around comes around", ie, there's a very good chance how you treat someone today- inadvertently or not- will come back to bite you in the ass quite soon. So before we decide to snap at the next person, presumably to their faces, let us sit back and ponder about how we'd feel if targetted the same way by someone else, attacked by our worst fears thrown unceremoniously at our faces through someone's 'subtle' actions and gestures. Because if we won't like it, they won't in all likeliness either, and if we don't seriously need to hurt somebody, why waste your energy spreading grudge, hatred and resentment against you in somebody's heart, huh? Is it honestly worth it for ourselves?
PS: A million apologies for the moralistic tone in the last para. I promise something lighter in the next post. Thank you for reading my blog. Cheers :)
In this context, I think of a person who prided herself on her sarcastic (witty in her words) tongue, symptomatic of the disease in the liberal, intellectual climate of a cosmopolitan university where one feels the need to distinguish themselves from others to such an extent that they choose friends from a very narrow social spectrum that they aspire towards, so as to distance themselves from the other kind- the uncool types (rather a large and diverse category in itself for each individual)- that they shudder to identify themselves with. The freedom to choose friends and bond with them strongly in a competitive environment gives rise to insecurities (often very well-camouflaged) that one then tries to mitigate through words- abrasive, cutting, spiteful, damaging and sometimes downright cruel- targetted on those deemed weaker than oneself by one of many standards, hence basing those new bonds on the carcasses of others- the less important ones. The 'wit' I talk about becomes a tool for elimination, sometimes with methods that can be considered brutal and random, so as to project and protect an image of the self that one tries to build, distancing oneself from the one they were born and grew up with, that which connects them closest to their roots. To prop oneself up, one needs to balance oneself on somebody else, possibly crushing them in the process, and some people thrive in using this method repeatedly to build their lives, irrespective of how competitive the atmosphere gets; sometimes it is just a habit one enjoys too much to get rid of it.
The idea behind this piece was not to judge this breed, of whom I am undoubtedly a part too, at some level (though, as we both agree, that purpose did not quite get served in this piece). The point is to suggest that "what goes around comes around", ie, there's a very good chance how you treat someone today- inadvertently or not- will come back to bite you in the ass quite soon. So before we decide to snap at the next person, presumably to their faces, let us sit back and ponder about how we'd feel if targetted the same way by someone else, attacked by our worst fears thrown unceremoniously at our faces through someone's 'subtle' actions and gestures. Because if we won't like it, they won't in all likeliness either, and if we don't seriously need to hurt somebody, why waste your energy spreading grudge, hatred and resentment against you in somebody's heart, huh? Is it honestly worth it for ourselves?
PS: A million apologies for the moralistic tone in the last para. I promise something lighter in the next post. Thank you for reading my blog. Cheers :)
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